All Alone in a Crowd

Poetry and Thoughts of a “Child of the Sixties” Tristan-Paul J. Hand

A December Morning Thought

There’s something comforting about sitting in a darken room on an early Sunday morning with just the tree lights twinkling and window candles lit, their single light sending a quiet guiding message of welcome into the morning darkness.

Comforting to have a loyal companion curled by your side and knowing the person you are madly in love with sleeps soundly and safely upstairs.

The soft melancholy sound of Elizabethan chorale music floating through the room is joined by the grandfather clock chiming the quarter hour and then back to the even tick tock, as it measures time.

The aches of the body and age melt away as remembrances of previous Christmases and family now gone play upon memories stage.

It is this time of day, that moment caught between the gray shade of night and mellow gray of morning that I love. The awakening of the world outside with morning bird songs and the yawn of nature.

December 29, 2014 Posted by | Age, Christmas, Dare To Dream Readers, Family, Holidays, Nature | Leave a comment

One More Day

I wish,
I had one more day,
To say the things I feel.
One more day
To tell the truth,
One more hug,
One more smile,
One more “I love you.”
The years have gone by so quickly
But your leaving seems like a sunset ago.
So much left unsaid.
I’ve rehearsed what I would say
And wondered
If you’ve heard me,
Or read my thoughts
In your eternal rest.

Just one more day,
One more day.

February 7, 2010 Posted by | Age, Dare To Dream Readers, Death, Family, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings | Leave a comment

Journey’s End

Beyond the white drifts
Of Winter’s cold crystals,
Is journey’s end.

A destination
Started so long ago.

It’s hidden out of view,
Just on the other side
Of the approaching vale,
And nestled near the glen
Of all my dreams.

January 24, 2010 Posted by | Age, Death, Faith, Nature, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings | 1 Comment

It’s Alright

As a small boy,
When bad dreams caused me to wake in tears,
Mother’s hands would softly stroke my head,
Her tender voice would calm me,

“It’s alright my son
I’m right beside you.”

Youth brought scraped knees
Plus many growing pains.
Mother tended my wounds,
And soothed my frustrations,

“It’s alright my son
I’m right beside you.”

When adulthood came,
It found me in uniform.
A nation in conflict upon a foreign soil.
Mother’s letters would arrive,

“It’s alright my son
I’m right beside you.”

Careers have come and gone,
I’ve search for myself
In varied identities,
And always my Mother’s prayers,

“It’s alright my son
I’m right beside you.”

Recently, Mother passed away
As gently as she lived.
The other night, as tho in childhood again,
A dream caused me to wake in tears,
And I heard my Savior’s voice,

“It’s alright my son
I’m right beside you.”

In memory of Doris “Pat” Hand-Glock
1-11-25/1-17-94

January 11, 2010 Posted by | Death, Family, Holidays, Thoughts, Writings | Leave a comment

The Birthday Card

My heart is a playground for pain,
A schoolyard for children’s games
And I am caught in a world of solitary doubt.
I come to all with open arms,
Only to be tossed aside, useless, scorned
By friends and foe alike.
The search to find a companion
Is like the mariners of old
In quest of the new lands,
The new wealth, the new beauty
With the promise of life afresh.
Many I have spent time with,
Yet none return to seek solace
Or give freely
To this out of step rogue of a different age.
Love was in my arms once upon a dream,
And I held it tight to my chest,
Only to wake alone
And forgotten,
A memory upon a card.

January 3, 2010 Posted by | Age, Dare To Dream Readers, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings | Leave a comment

The Dream

Pardon me,
I really don’t mean to disturb,
But have you seen my dream?
You see, I’ve lost it
And well, maybe you might know where it’s gone.

Please, don’t leave.
It might not seem important
And yes, it was a child’s dream
But men need to hold onto a part of their childhood.

What?
Find another dream.
No. I couldn’t do that.
You see, the others been with me for a long time.
Its been a faithful friend in times of despair,
A comfort when lonely,
So a new dream wouldn’t be the same.

Yes, I dream’t many things as a child
But this one, well it’s special
And I want to find it again,
For you see,
I need the dream and the dream needs me.

You’re right,
Dreams are just illusions.
Reality is built on many peoples dreams,
Illusions cemented together by a union
Of hard work; want; faith; love
And ignited in the heart
By a child’s dream.

You tell me to find a new dream.
No. For mine was unique and it was mine.
One of the few original parts
Of my spirit and being.

You can tell me that it was age,
Or when we grow-up we leave behind the youthful innocence,
But I’ll search on
And maybe in the near future,
I’ll round the corner,
And there with out stretched hands
Will be an old friend,
My dream, Smiling and asking,
“Where did you go?
I’ve been here all the time,
Waiting for you.”

January 1, 2010 Posted by | Age, Dare To Dream Readers, Family, Mystical, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings, Youth | Leave a comment

New Year’s Eve

So it is,
So it has been,
So it will be.
In the middle of a Winter’s night,
We mortals deem to end
A cosmic fragment we call a year.
With a solemn stroke,
A clang of chimes,
A blow of horns,
With shouts, hugs, kisses.
Watch the dawn
And yearn for Spring.

December 30, 2009 Posted by | Holidays, Poetry, Seasons, Thoughts, Writings | 1 Comment

A Word

Alone,
a word of awesome power
dealing a blow that crushes
and destroys each fiber
of the heart,
Alone.

December 29, 2009 Posted by | Dare To Dream Readers, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings | Leave a comment

Real Tomorrows

Fire-lit shadows dance upon the ceiling
And frost drapes the hedgerows in the lanes
And then it paints with icy fingers,
Lovely pictures on cottage window panes.

A haloed moon races in the heavens,
And stars, like angel lamps, are slowly lit.
‘Tis then, my dear, I would love to see you,
As by the fire-bright hearth I sit.

I explore the glowing castles in the embers,
And recreate my world as it was then,
But this contains memories of sadness
For I know dear heart, we can’t go back again.

So I say goodbye to dancing shadows,
And to frost on the hedgerows in the lane,
And to the lovely, winter chilled pictures
Painted on the cottage window panes.

Our lives are lived in a world of real tomorrows
Time takes its toll on dreams of “used to be,”
But there is one thing I know for certain
My youth was sweet because you cared for me.

December 28, 2009 Posted by | Holidays, Nature, Poetry, Seasons, Thoughts, Writings, Youth | Leave a comment

Sanctuary Of Memories

Christmas night.

I close my eyes,
And slip into the sanctuary of memories.

There,
Echoes of a tune
That I sang in childhood.
A simple melody of my youth,
A carol of Christmas pageants gone.

Its centuries old refrain
Lingers among the hazy vision
Of specters now at rest.

Ancient words
Numb the body like a Winter chill
As I see the child I was
In the comfort
Of those who protected me.

Dizzy senses filled with pipe smoke.
Crackling fire lit logs,
Dancing bubble lights upon the tree,
Her gentle hand,
His warm smile,
Forever haunting.

The choir of my school days softly sing,
“Of all the trees that are in the woods,
The holly bears the crown.”

December 27, 2009 Posted by | Christmas, Family, Holidays, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings, Youth | 2 Comments

Fall In Ohio

Season of pause

Before the slumber

November 21, 2009 Posted by | Nature, Ohio, Poetry, Seasons, Thoughts | Leave a comment

Autumn’s Reflection

Winter’s cold touch
lies hidden in the months to come,
yet in the gusts of Autumn
one senses the icy presence
lurking near.

Soon scattered leaves become a quilt
of many hue’s in a mosaic splendor.
Acorns fall upon the ground
as squirrels reap the harvest
and prepare for times ahead.
Chipmunks hurry to and fro,
their cheeks puffed full
and everywhere the eye beholds
color to adorn the majesty
of earth.

Soon the gilded trees
will stand bare to the breath
of Winter.

Soon the rushing winds
will turn to howls and drifts of snow,
but for now,
it’s Autumn,
that season which gives us pause
to reflect upon the months past
and the few to come.

September 26, 2009 Posted by | Age, Mystical, Nature, Poetry | Leave a comment

Seniors Lament

In the silence of night
I hear the tick tock of time.

I feel the push of age
and the pull of the unknown.

August 12, 2009 Posted by | Age, Death, Poetry, Thoughts | Leave a comment

The Curtain

Hanging so free,
So loose across the portal,
Revealing the light from without,
Yet protecting that which inhabits within.
In its opening,
The new begins,
And in its closing,
Life pauses,
Peering,
Waiting,
Watching,
All in anticipation
Of the curtain being lifted.

June 12, 2009 Posted by | Age, Death, Faith, Poetry, Thoughts | Leave a comment

Port Of Call

Hear me
utter
woeful cries
upon a destined voyage
across the tempest sea.
My mind deformed,
sent into convulsions
on every notion it perceives.
Are facts mere fantasies?
I sanely progress
to the brink,
even to the crevice bottom of insanity.
Theories: the demon
housed within the nave of doubt,
which hangs
as a choking noose
around the fiber of existence, and
causes me to tremble.
Seek!
Journey to your port of call,
and there
every particle shall unfold.
Peace will reign,
contentment, sublime in silence.

May 15, 2009 Posted by | Death, Faith, Poetry, Thoughts | Leave a comment

Lot

I’ve often wished my spirit could be free to fly

unfettered by the chain of some lost memory

or by some present ghost not seen.

But since the stars in their courses seem determined

to play me the fool, then who am I to protest

against my lot.

If time could stand still and songs of guilt remain

a lost and tragic cord, then I would lift my voice

and shout I am free.

May 15, 2009 Posted by | Faith, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings | Leave a comment

A Morning Day Dream

Folk music
Gently breaks the silence,
Streams of the morning sun
Fill the room with soft warmth.

Shadow curled around my legs
To protect me from some perceived danger,
But it’s only age creeping in upon my body
And she is unaware of it’s presence.

My eyes drearily close,
And in the grayness
Random memories dart about as tho water spiders
Upon a Summer’s pond.

I wonder why I linger so?
Is it the many chores undone,
The visions not yet dreamed,
Or could it be that I’m afraid?

Somewhere off in the distance
I hear a familiar voice call in the evening shade,
“Come home, suppers ready
And we’re waiting for you.”

Will I disappoint if I tarry?
If I try to dream one more dream,
Or run against the wind
One more time?

May 2, 2009 Posted by | Age, Death, Faith, Mystical, Nature, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings, Youth | Leave a comment

Standing Room Only

For most of life I have found myself on stage,

Or sitting in the front row.

Now it is humbling

To find myself in standing room only.

April 14, 2009 Posted by | Faith, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings | 3 Comments

Where Do Dreamers Go?

Where do dreamers go,
when there’s no more dreams
or when Mothers, roses and innocent days are gone?

Where do dreamers go,
when there’s no more sunbeams
or when unicorns, special smells and memories fade?

Where do dreamers go,
when their tired of sleeping alone
or when fireplaces, hayrides and romantic walks are in the movies?

Where do dreamers go
when their all grown up?

April 9, 2009 Posted by | Faith, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings | 3 Comments

The Piper, Crow and Me

I hear a lone piper
in the distance
the dirge he plays
a sad lament.
He has played that tune before
when I was younger
and then again not so long ago.
Now he plays more clearly
his mournful tune for me.

I hear the call of the crow
as it wings its way on high.
It has called before
when I was younger
and then again not so long ago.
Now its spirit cry I hear more clearly
for his call is to me.

Weep no more
let not a salty tear flow
nor let your sobs be heard.

I am the son of ancient Celts
heir to a thousand years of mist.

My soul soars above the green clover fields
dotted with brown thatched roof homes.
I hover near babbling streams
and play in the sea spray.

So let the piper’s dirge echo in the night
and let the winged messenger call
for I smell the peat fires of early dawn
and yearn for home.

April 4, 2009 Posted by | Death, Faith, Mystical, Nature, Poetry, Thoughts | Leave a comment

Woods At Dawn

A shroud of mist
hangs tightly to the valley below
as the tops of firs
spire through,
creating a mosaic
seen from the hillside above.
The heaven
with its crown of stars,
still wrapped
in that gray color
somewhere between dawn and night.
In the distance,
a lark calls to the wind.
Nearby,
his mate answers.
The dying embers of the campfire
glow orange
that announce its slow death
from the blaze it knew
only hours before.
The earthy smell of dampness
fills the senses
as the eyes of nature
peer out from tree stumps and thickets.
Across the lake,
which lays as a blue silk upon the land,
a loon’s cry echoes
then falls to silence.
I sit upon a log, quiet,
for God walks in the woods,
and I will not disturb.

February 22, 2009 Posted by | Faith, Mystical, Nature, Poetry, Thoughts, Writings | 2 Comments

Reflection

When I reflect upon my life already done
and summon the illusions
to come forth from darkened memories hall.
I sit and watch the play transpire
as if the lines had never been uttered,
or the cast of characters unfamiliar to my sight.

As a youth I had a Dog named Lady.
We went everywhere together that boyhood friend and I.
Across the meadow I named for her we’d romp
or by the cool stream we’d rest.
Every boy should have a dog to remember as a man.

Often I’ve asked,
what has happened to the lad who ran freely across fields,
hiking trails or daydreaming out the classroom window?
Then with an unsure look into the mirror I see myself older, taller,
but housed within there’s a boy,
still running among the wild flowers of Lady’s Meadow
on a summers day.

February 21, 2009 Posted by | Dogs, Nature, Poetry, Thoughts, Youth | Leave a comment

Where Have They Gone

When I was a bit of a boy
I’d sit on Daddy’s knee
And ask great questions.
Where is the end of the rainbow?
Is there a pot of gold?
And do the wee people really exist?
But most of all I wondered
What has happened to the magical beasties
Of our hearts and minds?
Those horn’d little steeds
Belongin’ to another age,
Lost to us since the flood
But ever present in our thoughts,
Where have they gone?
Hushed forever are the echoes of the piper
Playin’ beneath the moon
As unicorns dance.
No more do great hunters watch in awe
As herds pass by
In silent run.
No more the fair maidens
Do they charm,
Or graze in woodland glades
With peace and calm.
Where hides this creature
That mere thought gives us smile?
Are they gone for good
Or only in a child’s mind?
Daddy listen!
I hear brayin’ in the wind,
But Daddy’s gone
And I still search for the unicorn.

February 21, 2009 Posted by | Faith, Mystical, Nature, Poetry, Thoughts | Leave a comment

The Dog And The Man

dog-picSofia Duchess of Muscovy 6/24/92-5/27/08 *

In Memory of a Loyal Friend.

As a boy, I had several dogs to romp and play with,
And then later in life, to remember in fondness.
There was Rusty and Scamp,
Companions of my childhood.
Lady and Bonnie Gay Heather,
The friends of my teenage years.
With love and affection they followed my every youthful move.
Every boy should have a dog to remember as a man.
Almost thirty years passed,
Until another spirit of the wild would come into my life,
And she brought all the comfort of my youth
With the pleasure of my age.
Every man should have a dog to bring out the boy.
Fifteen years of unselfish and unconditional love
Has left a hole in my heart by her passing.
I see her soft blue eyes in the fading light of evening
And feel her head upon my lap when all seems lost
From the burdens of the day.
Her memory greets me at the door
As tho she still waits expectantly.
I feel her brush upon my leg in passing
As I walk about the house
Missing her gentle love and faithful trust.
Even in her death,
She gives me comfort and love,
Whisper softly,
“Miss you Sof”.

picture-sofia-0021*A Big Thank You to Kathleen Briggs who painted the portrait of Sofia.
Portrait In Pastels…pets and people.
To obtain more info add comment for information.

February 21, 2009 Posted by | Dogs, Nature, Pets, Poetry, Siberian Husky, Thoughts, Writings | Leave a comment

Time For…

Christmas is the time for remembering,
It’s the time for all those hidden thoughts of days gone by
And all those dreams that might have been.
Christmas is the time to recall friends of the past
And times shared in moments of warmth and joy.
It’s what makes the rest of the year worthwhile
Or life more bearable.
Christmas, a word that brings forth smells of bread and cakes,
Of wood smoke and pine boughs
Or Granddad’s pipe.
A time for choirs and carols,
Bells and steeples,
For snow and ice,
Grandeur and a humble stable,
A moment of peace in a world of turmoil,
A brief period, when all turn to noble thoughts,
A Holy Season of a Child’s birth.
Christmas, the perfect plan for life.

December 21, 2008 Posted by | Christmas, Faith, Holidays, Poetry, Thoughts | 2 Comments

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